whip me good
- By Kelly Diels
- 26 March, 2012
- 15 Comments
Behind the emerald curtain. On Friday I got whipped by Erika Lyremark and it hurt so good.
I did it because several of you were raving about her, so I thought, let’s see. I thought I knew what it was – a freebie session with a coach aimed at getting me onboard as a client – and I thought she’d do her schtick…
This isn’t making me sound like a very nice person, is it? Sometimes I’m a little jaded by this online biz.
It was a 15 minute call.
My life changed at moment seven.
Erika asked me why the book wasn’t getting finished (it’s in pieces all over my hard-drive and in my blog), why I’m not yet trying to get an agent, why I haven’t written the proposal. And I blathered something about my fear of rejection.
And she said – and I’m paraphrasing - bullshit.
She said that if the book was important enough to me I’d be willing to stand naked in the town square while being pelted with rotten tomatoes. She said that I’m not finishing the book and forcing it into publication and the world because I’m not passionate enough about it. She said the book I’ve been half-assing is the book I know people will like, the book I can sell, the book that will do reasonably well…but it’s not the book I NEED to write. It’s not the book that will make a rift in the world.
And she was right. And I said, “oh my god, how do I give you money?”
And as soon as I got off the phone I logged into paypal to do just that and and then I logged into my blog to write this.
I don’t yet know what The Book, my book, is about. But I’m going to dig deep and find out and then I’ll stand naked in the town square adorned only by my words.
The ones that will make a rift in the world. The ones I need to write. The ones I need to write for you.
Hopefully you won’t throw tomatoes…
But I look good in red.
About the author
- More at
I completely understand where you are coming from. I spent about a year “working” on a project that I thought was marketable and had the interest of agents, but I wasn’t that thrilled with it. All because I thought that it was the book I SHOULD write, not the one I WANTED to write. So I spun my wheels, cursed my laziness, and found every excuse to avoid working on it. Once I shifted to the book I WANTED to write, the excuses disappeared and I got to work. Good luck with the book you NEED to write.
[Reply]
kellydiels
replied:
on March 26th, 2012 at 11:37 am
@Michael, oh wow, I am WITH you.
Now I need to figure the new book out…and I’m all turned on by the prospect.
[Reply]
I know a book I think you need to write. But you might need to write something else first.
Since you’re in the mood, let’s pile on…
Sunday School for Sentences. What’s up with that? You have all the material. You have an initial editor (*cough*). You have people who will promote it. Stuff it into a Wurd file and outsource the design. It’s not hard to do or understand. In fact, it’s a perfect procrastination project, something to finish up while you’re writing your Book.
Much love, as always.
-d
[Reply]
Nikki
replied:
on March 26th, 2012 at 12:30 pm
@Dave Doolin, THAT is the BEST idea. Sunday School for Sentences. Please publish it. Or at least think about it. As an e-book at the very very least.
[Reply]
Michele Lisenbury Christensen
replied:
on March 26th, 2012 at 2:09 pm
I love a good pile-on. Grr.
@Dave Doolin is right: the demand and support are here. Not to distract you. Just to whip you a little more. With love.
[Reply]
Nikki
replied:
on March 27th, 2012 at 4:16 am
@Michele Lisenbury Christensen, lol! PILE ON!
[Reply]
plus you’ve already written your book, over and over most likely, in your head. So get it on paper already!
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This kind of honest-tell-one-on-yourself post is why I love Cleavage! And I have a strong feeling when you’re naked in the town square we’ll be throwing rose petals instead of tomatoes!
[Reply]
Nikki
replied:
on March 26th, 2012 at 12:28 pm
@Sandi Amorim, Ooh lala!
[Reply]
Preach it, Kelly! I believe that many of us are in the same situation–the Book is boiling and summersaulting deep within us and all we can do is run in circles until it comes flying out…at least that is how it feels to me. Thanks for giving the process words.
[Reply]
I don’t want to say “I don’t you so” buuuuut…. In 15 minutes Erika summed me up and made me realize I HAD to HAD to work with her. NOW look – a brand new spankin’ new website, a signature offering for people to know me by(woot), and more, much more to come. I’m in her Hustle Your Business bootcamp right now and it. is. an incredible experience. I don’t promote people without good cause. (Which is why I’m constantly rabbiting off YOUR name, Mrs.)
[Reply]
WordPress just told me I was typing too fast.. and I just noticed a glaring error in my last post soo.. it was right. I just got overly excited about you + Erika and nakedness and rose petals. My bad.
[Reply]
Hi Kelly,
Might there be some other reasons why your book might not be getting finished as well? For example, that the publishing/agenting/distribution system is completely dysfunctional? That it is driven by too many forces that have little to do with heart and art?
That ease of entry is way too easy and most often only contributes to the overwhelming din (200,000 new books are published every year with sales averaging between 500 and 1000 copies, often because really good writers are not really good marketers and self-promoters.
That the dream of writing a book has been manipulated and conditioned into us (often by well-meaning people), using the same dynamics that are used to sell millions of dollars in lottery tickets.
If I write a book that millions of people read and love, that will finally be the proof required for even the most ardent anti-fan to know that hey, I am CAPABLE and LOVABLE.
As someone with four books currently in a state of unfinish, I know there are lots of reasons why books don’t get finished. And many more reasons lying below the level of conscious awareness.
And you don’t even have to email me a Paypal check for pointing these few out!
[Reply]
The whipping is oh so good!!
I’m a big fan of Erika, plus I’ve been through the Daily Whip and Hustle Your Biz. It changed the way I was doing things!!
She is so great at calling people out on their shit!! I bet she’ll help you tune into that book that’s percolating around inside of you.
I’ll offer this bit of advice- start thinking about what you stand for and what get’s you all riled up….what pisses you off and makes you want to take action to change things….there is where you will find your book.
Rock on!
Leah
[Reply]
LOVE this. LOVE Erika. I’m not a fan of tomatoes – in any context, but am quite certain we’ll not need to test that theory anyway.
The book will be brilliant. It will be deep. It will be gorgeous. Hell…it will be you.
Hearin’ the crack of the whip from here!!!
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