A bit of hearsay brilliance from my friend’s therapist:
You’re looking for red flags to slow your roll. Stop looking for red flags. Instead, proceed only when you see green flags.
That’s a world of difference.
_________________
this note is part of a series outlining the story of the Very Bad Lying Man, a few months after the fact:
December 2009. The thin line – cleavage, even – between vulnerability as strength and just out-and-out stupidity.
Here are the breadcrumbs. Bits of the Very Bad Lying Man fell into these posts while the un-love story was happening:
August 2009. Vacation. Day 1. I am THAT Scene in When Harry Met Sally, but It Is Real. And Better.
August 2009. On Being a Needy Girlfriend and What IT SHOULD Teach You
August 2009. When Tough Love Turns Poetic. In a blood, guts, and broken-ego kinda way.
September 2009. On Harm, Healing, Ceilings and How Absent Apologies are the Pits – The Sorry Series, #1
September 2009. How To Receive an Apology. How To Accept an Apology. How To Forgive. Or Maybe Not. – The Sorry Series, #4
December 2009. ask and ye shall…well just ask, anyways.
January 2010. I am the female Bluebeard of suburban Vancouver and I am running out of closet space.
February 2010. Love is a Compass.
February 2010. sexifesto
March 2010. butterflies are a drug and I’m in rehab
March 2010. hearsay brilliance: “Only go when the light is green”
oooooooooooh, love this!!!
[Reply]
Kelly Diels
replied:
on March 22nd, 2010 at 8:06 am
@Square-Peg Karen, that was EXACTLY what I said, when I heard it, too.
[Reply]
So true! When you stumble upon a red flag, look around until you find the green flag, and go that way.
Hugs and butterflies,
~T~
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A friend over last week, asking questions about how to promote his DJ business.
He asked “What if?” “What if?” “What if?” so many times I turned to Deacon and said “I can’t recall the last time I even thought ‘What if?’”
[Reply]
Kelly Diels
replied:
on March 22nd, 2010 at 8:05 am
@Dave Doolin, oh hell. That’s awesome.
[Reply]
Dave Doolin
replied:
on March 22nd, 2010 at 10:31 am
@Kelly Diels, I’ll speak for Deacon, just cause we can do that sometimes: “You know, I can’t either.”
[Reply]
Kelly Diels
replied:
on March 22nd, 2010 at 10:44 am
@Dave Doolin, this may show up somewhere, soon.
[Reply]
Deacon
replied:
on March 22nd, 2010 at 11:06 am
@Dave Doolin, Yeah, I really couldn’t think of the last time I thought or said that. That was indeed a good moment.
[Reply]
Immediately sending my friends the link to this entry…
If only I had known this (and followed it) like eleventy thousand times in my life…
[Reply]
Clear, clean and unmistakable.
When I see a red light there’s no point in sitting there waiting for it to change. Now I look around for the green and go that way, instead. There’s a reason the green is “that way” — go with the flow and see where it leads.
Thanks, Kelly!
[Reply]