I’m an experienced pickup artist in my 30s and I’ve read and reviewed a galaxy of PUA lit and product. Most of what you’ll read is marketing copy, the kind of over-the-top marketing that is common with any product you find on the Internet. Don’t let the marketing mislead you about the intended audience, though, because most guys who buy the stuff are just regular dudes who want to get a few more dates in their lives. I submit to you that there’s nothing at all wrong with that goal. YES, there are plenty of creepy PUA guys out there, but they are a tiny percentage of the population.

Another point: much of pickup actually came from sales techniques. Research Sandler System and you’ll see some remarkable similarities. If you can use psychology to sell someone an expensive product, you can use psychology to build attraction. I happen to work in sales and it’s essentially the same.

Pickup is also evolving rapidly and has changed significantly since I first got into it. These days, there is a TON more thought and interest in general well roundedness, well being, and growing your inner self to be more outwardly attractive, then is given credit for. Probably the material you looked at is some of the older, less mature material.

Almost any pickup product you purchase these days will have some kind of inner game or self-growth component to it. Again, I submit to you, this is not a bad thing.

Lastly, you are a silly silly girl.

“I feel that it is unnatural to try and tame it, or try to control it.”

Murder is also part of evolution/survival. Taking the lives of your adversaries is a perfectly normal part of being ‘an animal’ and of survival itself. Would you condone that as well?

The part of pickup that’s new is that it’s a structured, online-based, methodical process that’s being taught to evolutionarily-underqualified men. Society itself is programmed to dislike things that artificially screw with natural selection. Pick up is one of those things. Pick up (at least in theory) is the male equivalent of a ‘love potion’ that fat ugly women can use to reel rich, good looking, successful men in who get placed under their spell. Would YOU be cool with that kind of love potion being used on you? I didn’t think so.

Now keep in mind that yes, I’m making this overly dramatic and that it doesn’t work like this in the real world. Pick up in the real world is about growth and personal development (otherwise it doesn’t work), but you have to remember that the media and society is looking at it the way it’s portrayed. And it’s portrayed as a love potion.

DJ Fuji
Dating & Life Coach

I suppose I am to the point where I find your reaction kind of funny. Not that I don’t respect your feelings on the subject. But from my perspective we are all animals equal with the other beasts of the planet. We have two main drives in life: survive and replicate. Now misogyny and “objectifying women” is not a product of our culture or our society. It’s naive that think that our society causes men to be misogynistic. It’s not society, IT’S IN OUR BLOOD. The EXTREMELY strong programming and wiring instilled in every man (especially me, I have an enormous sex drive) is the product of MILLIONS of years of evolution. We (men) want to sleep with every attractive woman that we see. I’m thankful for this very strong drive inside of me because it was the same drive in my ancestors that ALLOWED ME TO EXIST. I feel that it is unnatural to try and tame it, or try to control it. Women will call me a “boy” or “immature” or that I “need to grow up” or that I am “sexist”. Just as a poster said above, it is in a woman’s best interest that her man only sleep with her. From an evolutionary sense, a man that sleeps around is less likely to care for a woman and the inevitable child that will be born. A man that is hopelessly devoted to one woman is more likely to stick around and “protect and provide” for the woman and her offspring. On the flip side, it’s in the man’s best interest to spread as much seed as possible!

The art of pickup is nothing new. And to “hate” it would be the equivalent of hating THE ENTIRE MATING PROCESS. All pickup does is teach men how to attract and sleep with women. This process is the reason why our species is here today. The pickup principles work because they are steps in the natural mating process of humans. Some guys naturally get it, and some guys don’t. I’m a more technically oriented guys that had a mother with a very strong character. Now I used to think, “just be nice to a girl and she will like you for who you are.” Silly me. I found out this JUST DOESN’T WORK. Women like men who have boundaries, self-esteem, and will put their foot down. I’ve seen it over and over and over and over again. The more women say they like “nice guys” the more it instills my beliefs. I believe a woman “thinks” she wants a nice guy, but she’s really attracted to a STRONG man.

That’s where the art of pickup comes in. It teaches men the process. It teaches them techniques and “lines” so that they come across confident. It allows them to practice the art and become competent in all areas of seduction. Don’t blame misogyny and sexism on our “society” or a book called The Game. It’s the way we are. It’s in our programming and DNA. We want to spread our seed. And women will never understand because you are not in our body. You don’t realize how strong this drive is.

Being a “Be the change you want to see in the world” person, myself, I grind my teeth often. Your thoughtful and fair treatment of these issues is most welcome.

Girls that play games should be ignored and that’s that. Duh *rolleyes*

What about guys who play games… AKA Pick Up Artists?