Comments on: Love. Why We Should All Get Some, How To, and I Heart Salon http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/ Cleavage is about the three things everyone wants more of: sex, money and meaning. Kelly Diels is writing through the lines that shape us. Thu, 09 Sep 2010 05:06:24 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Existential Cleavage: How much do you love me? And who’s in charge? | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-32163 Existential Cleavage: How much do you love me? And who’s in charge? | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Tue, 06 Jul 2010 17:33:02 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-32163 [...] using fishing metaphors???), because in the past I have, maybe, possibly, perhaps, very definitely railed against exactly this idea: I’m amazed at how tentatively mid-life adults approach relationships; at how we compulsively [...] [...] using fishing metaphors???), because in the past I have, maybe, possibly, perhaps, very definitely railed against exactly this idea: I’m amazed at how tentatively mid-life adults approach relationships; at how we compulsively [...]

]]> By: I Don’t Have Time for A Mid-life Crisis Because I Just Got Cable. A Social Critique (Sorta), Referrals to My Favourite Self-Help Gurus, and a Plea To Salon. Again. | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-30200 I Don’t Have Time for A Mid-life Crisis Because I Just Got Cable. A Social Critique (Sorta), Referrals to My Favourite Self-Help Gurus, and a Plea To Salon. Again. | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Thu, 22 Apr 2010 17:57:56 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-30200 [...] Salon. I lovehate you so much. Why do you spurn my imaginary advances? We should be together. You LOVE caustic critique and eclectic personal voice. I’m a [...] [...] Salon. I lovehate you so much. Why do you spurn my imaginary advances? We should be together. You LOVE caustic critique and eclectic personal voice. I’m a [...]

]]> By: The Politics of Hair and How Salon Just Ruined My Life. Pity the Children. | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-27969 The Politics of Hair and How Salon Just Ruined My Life. Pity the Children. | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Sat, 10 Apr 2010 05:27:30 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-27969 [...] I think pretty much everything at Salon is interesting, so I clicked on it and in return for my unwavering devotion, Salon has ruined my [...] [...] I think pretty much everything at Salon is interesting, so I clicked on it and in return for my unwavering devotion, Salon has ruined my [...]

]]> By: The Forgiven. Part 5 of The Sorry Series #sorryseries | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-25464 The Forgiven. Part 5 of The Sorry Series #sorryseries | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Fri, 02 Apr 2010 05:01:15 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-25464 [...] caution and my fears evaporate daily. Now I subscribe to (and make up) theories of bounce and and resilience and faith. Now I allow for mistakes. Now I embrace mistakes. Now I don’t have to get it right [...] [...] caution and my fears evaporate daily. Now I subscribe to (and make up) theories of bounce and and resilience and faith. Now I allow for mistakes. Now I embrace mistakes. Now I don’t have to get it right [...]

]]> By: Nicki http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-1506 Nicki Thu, 19 Nov 2009 20:59:33 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-1506 I am coming into your conversation late and couldn't even tell you how I found you but am super glad I did. Your words, "Love requires abandon, irrationality, surrender, butterflies, feeling, vulnerabilty, risk. Get over the fear. It will all be fine. I know I will get rejected; it sucks; it hurts; but I will always be just fine. I have complete faith in my own resilience. I’ve recovered from heartbreak before and it was never pretty, but I’ve never regretted a love, even when I’ve suffered for it. Love is always a risk. The good stuff always is." This is so true. For those who think love happens and they can manage it without a heartbreak or some hurt or, at the very least, some risk, they are so misled. They are not looking for love but for a yes person to be there and tell them they are doing everything right. I am coming into your conversation late and couldn’t even tell you how I found you but am super glad I did.

Your words, “Love requires abandon, irrationality, surrender, butterflies, feeling, vulnerabilty, risk. Get over the fear. It will all be fine. I know I will get rejected; it sucks; it hurts; but I will always be just fine. I have complete faith in my own resilience. I’ve recovered from heartbreak before and it was never pretty, but I’ve never regretted a love, even when I’ve suffered for it. Love is always a risk. The good stuff always is.”

This is so true. For those who think love happens and they can manage it without a heartbreak or some hurt or, at the very least, some risk, they are so misled. They are not looking for love but for a yes person to be there and tell them they are doing everything right.

]]> By: Kelly Diels . com http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-408 Kelly Diels . com Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:16:41 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-408 <strong>a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.</strong> in the last twelve months, I - went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We're pretty fortunate we didn't have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I'd been in ... a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.

in the last twelve months, I – went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We’re pretty fortunate we didn’t have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I’d been in …

]]> By: Kelly Diels . com http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-407 Kelly Diels . com Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:11:59 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-407 <strong>a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.</strong> in the last twelve months, I - went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We're pretty fortunate we didn't have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I'd been in ... a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.

in the last twelve months, I – went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We’re pretty fortunate we didn’t have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I’d been in …

]]> By: Kelly Diels . com http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-406 Kelly Diels . com Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:08:46 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-406 <strong>a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.</strong> in the last twelve months, I - went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We're pretty fortunate we didn't have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I'd been in ... a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.

in the last twelve months, I – went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We’re pretty fortunate we didn’t have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I’d been in …

]]> By: Kelly Diels . com http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-404 Kelly Diels . com Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:07:36 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-404 <strong>a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.</strong> in the last twelve months, I - went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We're pretty fortunate we didn't have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I'd been in ... a year in the life. things you learn. stress. strength. joy.

in the last twelve months, I – went back to work after four years on the mommy track. That track required medication and friends helping me to open the blinds. I really do love them and the kids too but no, I do not feel guilty about working outside the home. We’re pretty fortunate we didn’t have a gas oven when I was a stay-at-home mom. (29)- got the first job I interviewed for and started my new job within days. And liked it.- definitively, really, truly ended a relationship that I’d been in …

]]> By: Kelly Diels . com http://www.kellydiels.com/2009/07/18/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/comment-page-1/#comment-403 Kelly Diels . com Wed, 23 Sep 2009 05:45:39 +0000 http://www.violetminded.com/test/index.php/2009/07/love-why-we-should-all-get-some-how-to-and-i-heart-salon/#comment-403 <strong>Ending a Good Thing for an Even Better Reason. Almost.</strong> I'm ending a relationship because I'm fat. We have passionate, easy, hours-long conversations, warmth, affection, respect, and outrageous sex. OUTRAGEOUS. Friendship, respect and hot sex: a pretty great foundation, right? What more can I ask for?Everything.Neither of us have butterflies. We were intensely comfortable with each other, right away. We're both romantics, so naturally this worries us. Where is the infatuation? What does the lack of infatuation mean? Where can this go if it doesn't start with addiction-like chemical highs? I asked around. Lots of people seemed to think this is no ... Ending a Good Thing for an Even Better Reason. Almost.

I’m ending a relationship because I’m fat. We have passionate, easy, hours-long conversations, warmth, affection, respect, and outrageous sex. OUTRAGEOUS. Friendship, respect and hot sex: a pretty great foundation, right? What more can I ask for?Everything.Neither of us have butterflies. We were intensely comfortable with each other, right away. We’re both romantics, so naturally this worries us. Where is the infatuation? What does the lack of infatuation mean? Where can this go if it doesn’t start with addiction-like chemical highs? I asked around. Lots of people seemed to think this is no …

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