Fat acceptance, sizeism, healthy and intuitive eating, social critique, my bodacious boobs and buddha belly, the beauty myth…I’ve been dreading this post all week.
On the one hand, something amazing has taken hold of me, and like a loving cat with a good dead mouse, I want to lay it at the feet of my mistress, the fat-o-sphere. I am no longer waiting – to be acceptable, to be thin, to be ready. This is it. This is my life and baby, I’m all IN.
On the other hand, I am a crap fat activist, mostly because I’m not an activist. That’s a problem. The other problem is that I have the same ol’ issues with fat acceptance that I do with feminism. I love it, I believe it, I claim it, and I’m so glad you’re righteously warring on my behalf, but I’m having trouble toeing the party line.
This inner ‘pause’ button is inhibiting what was supposed to be a sis-boom-bah book review of “Lessons from the Fat-O-Sphere: Quit Dieting and Declare a Truce with Your Body” by Kate Harding and Marianne Kirby. Honestly, I’m so conflicted about fat acceptance that I won’t do the book justice.
And that’s a shame because it is a pretty good book. Both Kate and Marianne rock the chatty, intimate voice of sass and righteousness which of course is my breakfast of choice. And they both have a good story to tell: how they came to believe in and embrace their own awesomeness despite being *gasp* fat. The book is all about mapping out that process so that other fatties can follow along in their footsteps and live happily, righteously, fatly ever after. Again – I’m in.
Still, the book has problems. Or maybe I do. It is probably me, but I just wish that the book was more weighty. I wish it was more academic. I wish that the authors had assembled a kick-ass team of scientists, statisticians and doctors to substantiate their assertions that fat is not that big of a health crisis (I truly suspect this is true; but shoot me, I want someone with an MD to back up these two English majors on the matter). I wish the book was more radical and political and theoretically cohesive and academic. ‘Course that book would never have sold, not even to me. And wow, do I wish that it was written in the first person, or at least anything other than the clunky, pretentious royal third person. “Kate thinks this…Marianne thought that…”. Kill me now. Both of them are vivid writers and this awkwardness is just a drag.
But this criticism is kind of disingenuous. If you read my blog, you know that I’m all “Kate Harding this…” and “Kate Harding that…” and “I’d switch teams for Kate Harding” (okay, I never actually wrote that, but I was thinking it). I kinda totally madly passionately think she’s the bomb and a most excellent writer. I really do like the book, too – and more than that, it is still living with me even a couple weeks after I put it down. One of the lessons of the book is to go out there and find a sport you like to do. Do it because you like to, not because you want to lose weight. Do it because you enjoy it and you enjoy what your body can do.
And that lesson landed with me. I am trying new things. I genuinely want to find a physical activity that I don’t have to force myself into because I ‘ought’ to do it. That kind of self-discipline is wildly over-rated and a failure-trap. But obsession, and mono-maniacal passion – well that I can DO. And I’d like to have that kind of connection with physicality. I have that kind of relationship with sex, but it would be nice to have the same sort of drive in more socially acceptable physical endeavours that are legally practicable in public. I mean, as a result of the fat-o-sphere recommendation to find a sport, I even checked out a Strong Man site today by The World’s Strongest Libarian. As in bending steel, gripping kettlebells (I don’t even know what kettlebells are!) and other weird macho teeth-gritting stuff. And it was awesome! Please stop me.
So the book is a worthwhile read. If you’re a self-hating fatty – or just plain self-hating – “Lessons from the Fat-o-Sphere” might even be an essential read. The message is intimate and urgent: love yourself, just as you are, and fuck the world and the skinny hegemony if they don’t love you back. Amen.
I really enjoyed reading this article, and I do agree that people need to accept their body type. I do think it is very important to exercise or just move. I really do not believe that we are designed to be inactive. As far as finding an activity (aside from having sex!) that is fun and good for you, I would recommend spinning. If you like cycling, and you like to sweat, you will love this group, indoor cycling class. Running is at the top of my activity list. And the ‘runner’s high’ can be just as good (if not better) than having sex!!
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Try Paul Campos’s _The Obesity Myth_ for more stats. Still not an MD, but goes into studies more.
I’m very impatiently waiting to read this book, and your review, ambivalence and all, is not helping me.
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Thanks Arwyn – Paul Campos is on my list of things to read and now just moved up a few notches. And, ambivalence aside, I really did enjoy Lesson from the Fat-o-Sphere. Enjoy!
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How NOT To Interview Someone
Last night I interviewed Danielle LaPorte for a guest post I’m writing for Write To Done. A few minutes in, I thought: wow. I am really NOT doing this right, or well.I’m awkward. I’m a bombshell in text and shellshocked in person and my darlings, I bombed this interview. I was abrupt and awkward and interrupt-y. The only thing that saved it was my subject. Danielle LaPorte gives good quote. Two Different Kinds Of Un-journalism Earlier in the week, I interviewed Josh Hanagarne for the same forthcoming piece. My interview with Josh went sideways, too, …
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How NOT To Interview Someone
Banana Interview, possibly by Banksy, Cans Festival London. Photo by Jo Barton.Last night I interviewed Danielle LaPorte for a guest post I’m writing for Write To Done. A few minutes in, I thought: wow. I am really NOT doing this right, or well.I’m awkward. I’m a bombshell in text and shellshocked in person and my darlings, I bombed this interview. I was abrupt and awkward and interrupt-y. The only thing that saved it was my subject. Danielle LaPorte gives good quote. Two Different Kinds Of Un-journalism Earlier in the week, I interviewed Josh Hanagarne for …
[Reply]
How NOT To Interview Someone
Banana Interview, possibly by Banksy, Cans Festival London. Photo by Jo Barton.Last night I interviewed Danielle LaPorte for a guest post I’m writing for Write To Done. A few minutes in, I thought: wow. I am really NOT doing this right, or well.I’m awkward. I’m a bombshell in text and shellshocked in person and my darlings, I bombed this interview. I was abrupt and awkward and interrupt-y. The only thing that saved it was my subject. Danielle LaPorte gives good quote. Two Different Kinds Of Un-journalism Earlier in the week, I interviewed Josh Hanagarne for …
[Reply]
How NOT To Interview Someone
Banana Interview, possibly by Banksy, Cans Festival London. Photo by Jo Barton.Last night I interviewed Danielle LaPorte for a guest post I’m writing for Write To Done. A few minutes in, I thought: wow. I am really NOT doing this right, or well.I’m awkward. I’m a bombshell in text but shell-shocked in person, and my darlings, I bombed this interview. I was abrupt and awkward and interrupt-y. The only thing that saved it was my subject. Danielle LaPorte gives good quote. Two Different Kinds Of Un-journalism Earlier in the week, I interviewed Josh Hanagarne for …
[Reply]